I have, occasionally approached a guy. I can't say that each time resulted in anything successful, but I can say that I left those guys with a lasting, positive impression. I'm first and foremost a Scorpio. I'm very true to my sign. I'm introverted, intuitive, jealous, but I'm also very passionate and loyal to those closest to me, so when I meet a man who interests me, whom I can possibly see having something meaningful with, I definitely make him feel like he's special to me. In case you haven't read, I wrote myself a love letter from the viewpoint of me being a man pursuing myself (If I Were A Guy). And it made me think: I'm getting on guys for not approaching me properly, but so many women are ruining guys by not letting them know how much they appreciate the ones they supposedly love. So why not? Why not write a letter to the man who's out there, anticipating, as I am, the moment we'll meet? Or even to the man I know is in a bad place out there with his woman, or one who's been hurt just to let him know that love is here for him if he so choses?
So, to the guy in the bad relationship, the one who's heart has been broken by divorce, the guy who's still clubbing because he's searching for an outlet to deal with the fact that he's lonely and for the guy who's just waiting for that perfect one, I'll tell you how I feel, and how men (especially those who are doing right by their women) should be treated:
Good morning Baby! Is that what you were greeted with when you woke up? If not, does she even bother to kiss you on your way out, wish you a wonderful day, or even make sure you have a decent, filling lunch? Or does she get up, complaining about you not giving her any money, not bothering to cook you breakfast, or nagging about you all having to go out with her friends later? And when you get home in the evenings, is there any sign of dinner being prepared? Does she wash your back while you're in the shower? Does she play video games with you, although she really can't? Does she even stay quiet long enough for you to watch a little sports? Does she make you feel the way Solomon would have felt with his Beloved when you make love?
See, I couldn't be satisfied with a man, who's taking great care of me, feeling less than...well, a man.
Could you hang out with your boys instead of my cackling friends and my overbearing mom? Absolutely. You could look at those other women, and some may even approach you, but you'd remember what would be waiting at home for you: The woman, who at any given time, will serve you breakfast in the heels you love. The woman who washes your hair and massages your shoulders. The woman who makes sure your kids' homework is right every evening. The woman who tells you to meet her at the hotel around the corner from your job for lunch...
And when we go out, would you be ashamed because I didn't know what to wear? Never. Because when we'd go out, I'd dress for YOU. From that sexy dress that you think makes me look like a "goddess," down to those underwear that kill me, but you love so much, is what I'd wear, all to make you the envied of wherever we'd decide to go.
And sure, I'd be able to hang that picture in the living room much better, but because I know you'd be so proud of it, I wouldn't belittle you. I'd hug you as if you'd figured out a way to end world hunger.
So you may lose your job or you won't get the promotion you thought you would, or you'd really like to try a new business venture. I'd be there to support you in any way possible. I'd know that you need me because I'd need you, and although I'll believe you can do anything you put your mind to, think of how much greater it could be if we'd accomplish it together.
You deserve to be respected and reminded that God sent you to me for a reason. He knew that I'd be the one you'd cherish because I'd help you fulfill the potential that's inside of you. I know that small things are really important, and we'd have our ups and downs, but you'd never ever have to wonder or worry that you've lost your place in my heart. My love would be to you like the rays of the sun, filling you with warmth with each beam.
All I'd ask of you would be honesty, respect and trust. I wouldn't ask you for anything that I wouldn't be willing to give myself, so all that I have would be yours. Given freely.
Right now, my heart, mind and spirit long for you. And the day that you decide you're ready to be loved unconditionally will be the day that my heart, mind and spirit depart me to dwell with you.Since I don't have a man, I can only keep the love that I have bottled up inside of me, but to you ladies who have men and are not appreciating them the way that they deserve, wise up! If that man is doing his best to take care of you (and probably a kid he didn't father), don't run him into the ground. Be caring and nurturing. Don't wear sweats or have your friends over EVERY DAY he comes home from work. He likes for you to have on a cute shirt and lip gloss every now and then when gets home. Kiss him, hug him, let him know that you want him to have a good day, or if he had a bad day, let him know that he's at home with you and everything is okay. Be trusting, not foolish, but trust him, and let him know that you do.
I know what you're saying, "You're single, so you don't know." On the contrary, Miss. I DO know. Wanna know how I know? I, like a lot of other women, get to hear about the bad (or lack of) sexual encounters with you. We get to hear about the nagging, and the fact that you had your sister going out of town with you two even though you know she doesn't like your man. We get to hear about how he's had to cut out some of the things he likes, or even get a second or third job because you're going on spending sprees like he's Donald Trump. And unfortunately, sometimes, we (the GOOD women) have to fight your man off because we seem to be everything you're not. I can guarantee that some of your friends are even looking at the way you're treating him and not all of them are going to turn him away, so I urge you to appreciate him. If you don't, someone else will always be standing there waiting to take your place...
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