(07/25/09)
1. Homeless, gold-toothed bogans will bother you at 6:45 a.m.
2. Salt water burns.....period
3. It's good to have a beach-specific playlist
4. Crabs will throw sand at you (not sure if they can actually help it or not)
5. Whoever coined the term "beach body" should be dug up, shot and re-buried
6. Real women wear bikinis (even if they top out at 300 lbs)
7. Sunrise really is the best time to go to the beach
8. Surfers and life guards are sexy even if they're not in Cali
9. Some dogs should never be allowed in public
10. Old ladies will get together and kick your ass if you try to mess with their belongings
11. America really does run on Dunkin' (I have yet to find a more refreshing iced coffee drink)
12. No matter your fitness level: jog. You may be going nowhere fast, but because you're on the beach, you'll look good getting there
13. The beach has a self-maintained lifestyle of its own and it's one of the coolest things I've ever witnessed
14. Any song by Sade, Jill Scott, Chicago or Steely Dan sounds good against crashing waves (as does Human Nature (MJ) and Summertime Rolls (Janes Addiction)
15. A sea turtle is not a mere water-dwelling reptile, but is actually a four-wheeled vehicle used for beach patrol
16. It took me wayyyyyy too long to realize the beach is therapeutic (especially if you're born under a water sign)
17. Sea gulls are ruthless and pigeons don't stand a chance against them (neither do toddlers walking around with food in their hands)
18. Sleeping on the beach with a booze-filled cooler trumps any visit to a quack psychologist
19. People who jog or ride their bikes with their dogs in tow should be tied up to their own cars and made to keep up
20. Water giveth and water taketh away....
and finally
21. Growing old (especially with someone you love) is a very beautiful thing
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